Chapter 29

With the safety chain on, I cracked the door open. I peeped through the opening, and I saw that Nigel did leave something on the floor. My heart sank when I saw the blue box with white ribbon. Could it be...?

I quickly grabbed it, and I closed the door. I sat on the floor as I leaned on the door. I stared at the box for awhile. I was totally in disbelief that this whole time I was suspecting Nigel bought another girl a diamond necklace, and it could have been for me all along. In a haste, I pulled the ribbon off the box, and tore it open. Sure enough... it was a platinum necklace with 4 marquis cut diamonds as a pendant. It was so beautiful. My jaw dropped and I felt like such a fool.

What moron I have been. It has never crossed my mind even once that Nigel was buying a Tiffany diamond necklace for me. I felt so horrible but at the same time ecstatic. I have never received such an extravagant gift like this, not from any man and especially not from my boss.

I called his room right away and he answered.

"I take it you got my gift?" He said.
"Come back here." I said.
"I'm actually getting really sleepy."
"Oh.."
"You had your chance." He said and laughed.
"I suppose I did." I said. "Listen, I'm sorry." I told him, softly.
"I didn't hear you. What did you say?" Nigel was being facetious.
"I said I'm sorry!!" I said out loud.
"Oh, that's what I thought you said. I just want to make sure I heard you right."
"I deserve that."
"Will you start trusting me now?" He asked. "It's completely unacceptable that you had been really cruel to me because of office gossips."
"I wasn't trying to be cruel." I said. "I wish you knew how it made me feel."
"I know." Nigel said. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."
"I dragged you down with me." I said.
"I came from New York that day before you were leaving town so I could see you and give you the necklace. But, you were utterly impossible."
"I thought you were a two timing lying bastard."
"You did tell me, however, that.. I had to find somebody else who would accept my situation since you wouldn't."
"I didn't mean it. None of it."
"Oh, is that so, Sabrina?"Nigel chuckled.
"Even if I did, it wouldn't be easy for me to accept that you're actually doing so with someone else."
"Well, I wasn't."
"Well, I didn't know."
"Well, you need to hear me out next time. Please...don't do this to me ever again." Nigel said.
"I'm really sorry." I said. "I truly am. But it didn't change anything between us, Nigel."
"I know. Just stop pushing me away and treating me like I'm a monster. I feel bad enough already dealing with our situation the way it is. Though, I know having feelings for you made me a bad man, I'm not a monster, Sabby. I'm actually a decent person."
"I know, sweetie." I said "I struggle with the same dilemma everyday."
"No matter what though, I want you in my life and I don't care in what capacity. I just want you in it." I couldn't help but to smile to hear what he had to say. I was so taken by his words that I forgot I was on the phone with him.
"Okay, Sabrina?"
"Okay." I said. "Why don't you go to bed if you're sleepy."
"Mh..okay.." He said and yawned. "By the way, did you like the necklace?"
"I love it...but I can't accept it." I said. "It's way too pricy and sure it's against company's ethical policy."
"I'll take care of it tomorrow." he said.
"How?"
"You'll see." He said. "Mh, how disappointing that I didn't get a chance to see your reaction when you opened it."
"I know." I said. "It wasn't pretty." I said and laughed. "Normally, I would do the oohs and aahs like any girl would do getting a blue box. But this time it was more like... 'aw shit! What did I do'."
Nigel laughed out loud... "Served you right. But that would have been priceless to see."
"Hahaha.." I laughed. "Yeh, I'd say."
"Please wear it tomorrow." He said, followed by another yawn. "Good night."
"Good Night." I said. 

I never thought I would sleep with a smile on my face tonight. I didn't sleep very well however because of the amount of alcohol I consumed and the excitement of what happened tonight, or should I say morning. My mind was way too wired to have a recuperating sleep. Even though I was asleep, my mind was up and I dreamed about the most obscure thing. I dreamed about Victoria having an affair with Jax; however, in my dream Jax was Emma's John. Then Emma was screaming at Victoria; however, in my dream, Victoria was me. When I woke up, I had cold sweat and my head felt like it was going to explode.

It seemed God was trying to tell me that I didn't have the place to be high and mighty to Victoria when I'm doing something a little worse than her. It's up to people's judgment I guess which was worse - sleeping with your best friend's ex, or being in love with someone's husband. Yet, it wasn't a competition and both of us are crummy women for doing these awful things.

I couldn't help to feel awful about it; yet, like Nigel said, I know I am not a horrible person. My parents raised me right and I do have my head screwed on right. This constant dilemma about doing the right thing and fighting the feelings in my heart that felt so natural is eating me alive.

I woke up super late, and I got a text from Eric.

"Nigel asked to leave you alone. We're off to our meeting. Text when you're up and about."

I looked at the clock and it was almost 11 o'clock. I did have an appointment with Flora at 10 A.M. After calling her and apologizing, I went about my day. This time, we had lunch trying the Malay cooking at Kampung Glam. It was so much fun and it felt great in my tummy.

Then, Eric texted me "Get here, stat. Drop whatever you're doing."

Again, I had to apologize to Flora, but she understood and I was pissed because again I had to rearrange my day for Eric. Then, I realized, it was for Nigel too. Then, I didn't feel so bad. Flora took me to the office of Singapore City Magazine in Shenton Way.

When we got to the front of the office building, I saw Nigel and Eric were standing outside talking.

"What are they doing outside?" I said to myself.
"Those are your bosses?" Flora asked.
"Yes, those two gentlemen over there."
"Wow, Sabrina... how could you focus on working?" Flora asked and giggled. "They're so handsome." I turned to see her and smiled.
"It's tough at times." I said.
"Which one you don't like?"
"That one on the right, Eric." I said.
"He's gorgeous!" Flora said.
"Do you want me to introduce you?" I asked.
"Oh...for what?" Flora said and laughed. "I'm married."
"Oh.." I laughed.
"Besides, I can't park here. Are they single?"
"I think Eric is. Nigel is married." I said.
"You and Eric actually make a nice looking couple."
"What? Me and Eric? Uh uh.... That's never gonna happen!" I said and laughed.

Eric saw me and flagged me down. So I said good bye to Flora and joined them. I had strapless sun dress in soft purple, and I had on the necklace. I had to do it after what I had done to Nigel. This was his time for me to kiss his bottoms a little.

"What are you two doing outside?" I asked.
"We're done with the meeting." Eric said.
"So, why did you tell me to come?"
"I said stat over an hour ago. This place is walking distance from the hotel."
"Well, I wasn't at the hotel. I had work to do you know."
"Children.." Nigel said. "Stop." I rolled my eyes and folded my arms as I turned to Nigel. Nigel looked at me with a smile and he was eyeing the necklace on my neck. He then cracked a bigger smile.
"No harm done." Nigel said. "Sabrina didn't know."
"What do you need me for?"
"Nigel wanted you to talk to the editorial staff." Eric said.
"But it's done. We signed the deal."
"It's a done deal?" I asked. "That quick? Eric said you were still on the due diligence phase?"
"We decided to move ahead with it." Nigel said. "It's a good buy."
"Wow." I said.
"Be happy, Sabrina." Nigel said. "Joie will be in Asia Pacific too now." Nigel high-fived Eric who had a big smile on his face.
"I really didn't know what happened to my South East Asian food trip." I said. "I couldn't even get half of the stuff I want to accomplish done." I said.
Eric put his arm around me and I turned to see his hand that was nested on my shoulder thinking what the hell was he doing putting his arm around me. He then said..
"Relax, Sabby. You got plenty done." Nigel wasn't pleased to see me inside Eric's embrace. He pulled my hand towards him, and I walked towards Nigel, leaving Eric behind.
"This will be your baby." Nigel said to me. "You will be in charge of the transition process from Singapore City Magazine to Joie Asia Pacific, then lead the division." My mouth gaped open.
"What?"
Eric smiled... "Yeah, Sabby. Congrats. You will be the Editor in Chief of Joie Asia Pacific."
"Will that require me to live here?" I asked with a lot of reservation and confusion.
Nigel shook his head. "Just a lot of traveling to these exotic part of the world."
I was still in disbelief... "Get out you two. Nigel, is this your doing?'
"It was Eric's idea." Nigel said.
I turned to Eric. Eric laughed and threw his hands in the air... "It was a no brainer move, Sabby. No one else can do the job better than you. It just makes sense."
"After I got totally wasted with the two of you, you want to give me a promotion?"
"Yeah!" they both said it in unison. I laughed as I put my hand in my forehead as I felt the headache coming in again.
"Let's go in... let's introduce Sabrina to the staff." Eric said.
"No..not today. Not looking like this." I said.
"You look fantastic." Nigel said.
"I'm not ready.." I said.
"Well, tonight at the gala."Eric said. "We can introduce her to the managing team."
"What gala?" I asked.
"Black tie event at the Singaporean Tourism and Travel Board." Eric answered.
"When do you guys plan to tell me this? My God!! I don't have anything to wear to a black tie gala! I didn't bring a gown! I didn't even bring heels!" I said.
"I meant to tell you last night.." Eric said as he scratched his brow.
"But, if I recall, we were all... what did you call it, Sabby?" Nigel said.
"Wasted."
"Yes."
I laughed exasperated being volleyed back and forth by these two. All of a sudden, Nigel said...
"Well, Eric... we'll see you tonight. Sabrina and I have some shopping to do."

Nigel whisked me away, and I just followed him. He was right, we had some shopping to do. I turned to see Eric, and he just laughed and waved at us.

"A promotion, really?" I asked Nigel when we comfortably sat in a taxi cab.
"Yes, really."
"Don't you think people will say something if they ever found out about us?"
"What about us? There's nothing going on with us."
"Nothing going on and how come you have your hand on my thigh?" I asked. He looked down to his hand, and he smiled...
"My hand has a mind of its own." Nigel said without removing it. I laughed and I removed it and held it.
"Are you trying to hide me away from every one?" He smiled.
"Yes." He said.
"Nigel!"
"It'll be great, Sabrina. You're way too talented to just handle the food section of Joie. I saw you in action. So did Eric. He had nothing but good things to say about you. This is what the audit was about."
"Are you serious?"
"You haven't figured that one out?"
"No... I am totally dumfounded." I said. I just couldn't believe that the audit was more of a job interview than an actual audit. It all made sense now why they singled me out for an audit. I just never saw it coming. I really didn't. I couldn't believe I didn't figure it out.
"Sweetheart, you really need to start to look at the positive on something. Don't always think of the worst scenario."
I nodded. "Noted." I said. "I've been totally wrong." I said confused.
"You're a fantastic person." Nigel said. "That's why I love you. You protect whom you love and you fight for them."
"I've been on the defensive for quite a long time." I said as I put my head on his shoulder. "I'm so tired..so tired of it." He looked down towards me as he kissed my forehead.
"Good things are happening, baby." He said. "Open you arms wide open and reap them in."

We went shopping at Orchard Road, and we had a ball taking a walk along the road. We stopped at the Takashimaya building where Chanel was located. Nigel dragged me in there after I refused profusely. He finally told me not to make a scene and that we were just going in there to look. We didn't. Found a dress I absolutely loved for about my whole paycheck. It was quite a simple black dress but it was so elegant. Then, I found a Jimmy Choo's heels to go with it. 

"Don't be ridiculous." I said when Nigel was going to pay for my items.
"This is business expense." Nigel said. "Put your credit card away." He said. "Again, don't make a scene."
"You can't be serious." Nigel looked at me and smiled. "You need to learn to enjoy being treated like a queen by a man."
I smiled as I caressed his cheek. "You know, I can get used to this rather quickly."
"I sure hope so." Nigel said.

I stood there, again dumfounded for the umpteenth time this week. I tried to savor that feeling being treated lavishly by a man. It felt unnatural to me. I tried to soak in his masculine energy and tried to get rid of the penis I thought I had. A man like Nigel just wanted the feminine energy from his woman, and though I am not his woman, I knew that was what he wanted. He didn't want a girl with a man complex next to him.

"Do you have one Singaporean dollar?" He asked.
"Yes.." I said and dug through my purse and handed him a dollar.
"Thank you." He said. "Now, we're even."
"Pardon me?" I asked and laughed.
"This is payment for your necklace and everything else."
"Hahaha...Nigel....you sneaky man." He laughed.
"You bought it." He said. "Good deal."
I just started laughing and put my arm around his. "I feel like Vivian in Pretty Woman."
Nigel laughed out loud. "She puts out though." Nigel said.
"She's a hooker." I said.
"Alright, case closed." Nigel said.

This trip to the South East finally picked up. All of a sudden from wanting it to be over soon, it changed to wanting to savor every minute of it. I didn't want him to leave tomorrow.

Chapter 28

I was getting cranky by the day with Eric Phillips. He was supposed to tag along with me on my trip, not the other way around! He has been having his own agenda and I ended up having to adjust my schedule to accommodate what he needed to do because it was as directed by Derek Stearns. He said food couldn't be more important than a multi million dollar acquisition. I understood the reasoning; however, it wasn't my priority. I came here for materials so we could produce a magazine. I didn't come here to buy a magazine.

After bickering with him at breakfast, we decided to part ways and not eat breakfast together. I swear it felt like we were an old married couple. All we did was bickering and getting on each other's nerves. It seemed we had natural skills in making that happen.

I was super happy to get a little break from Eric. He ditched the Jeff Corwin look for a suit and tie. He has been wearing some very pricy safari type shirt with plenty of ventilation. It made me laughed though he looked quite dashing in it nonetheless. However, when he walked in to the hotel's restaurant in a nice tailored tan colored suit, I did swallow a couple gulps of air as a reaction to the sight of him. Perhaps he had to be what people would refer to as "beautimous." I just learned it meant beautiful and fabulous at the same time.

Anyway, enough about Eric. It didn't matter how beautimous he was; he's still more annoying than a zit inside your nose. It's unimaginable how annoying he is. I just couldn't stand the guy.

I went about my day with my local tour guide, a Singaporean girl by the name of Flora. She took me to a traditional kopitiam for a cup of super sweet coffee, since it was mixed with condensed milk. We also had soft boiled eggs, and kaya toast for our day break. Kaya is a type of custard made with eggs, pandan leaf, and coconut milk. They're rich and creamy and delicious on a piece of toast. It was a great breakfast and it was much better than any breakfast I could have had with Eric. I was satisfied and happy.

Flora and I then went hunting for the king of Cat Mountain Durian. Durian is a fruit known for its distinctive pungent smell. It's definitely an acquired taste and it looks very very exotic with sharp thorns on its outer shell. Once you crack it open, you will find compartments where the fruits reside. The flesh is soft, creamy and fibrous, and if you liked it, it tastes delicious. If not, just imagine eating crap.

I happened to like it. I wish Eric would have been with me. It would have been priceless to see his beautiful face gagged. I knew with this one, he wouldn't be so open minded about trying it. It was just too bad he had to buy a magazine.

Then, we went to Dempsey Hill to check out what's available for the westerners. We found a quaint and cool grocery store called "Jones The Grocer," and it felt like home. I was in an orgasmic state when I walked into their cheese cooler. The selection they had was quite nice though being so far away from cheese producing countries. We had a little snack slash lunch there of salumi platter and several types of cheeses. I dipped my cheese in the truffle honey they served on the side, and it was superb. At first, I was skeptical thinking they added truffle oil to the honey; yet, it wasn't the case. It was great. Getting truffle oil drizzled on your food is as annoying as having to dine with Eric Phillips. I can't stand it!

Finally, it was time to re-group and catch up with Eric. It was unfortunate, but what else could I do. He texted me saying to meet him for dinner at Arab Street. Flora dropped me off at Arab Street and I took a walk along the neighborhood and it was pretty fascinating. As I passed one of the outside hookah cafes, I couldn't believe my eyes. I thought I saw Nigel. I quickly glanced away and thinking I was hallucinating. I went on taking pictures, and observed the street and tried to capture the lives the street had. When I looked back at the guy at the hookah cafe, I saw Eric sitting across from him. Now, I started rubbing my eyes. The guy turned towards me, as well as Eric. They both waved and called me in.

Son of a gun, it was Nigel.

Again, I looked like crap. I had been running around Singapore all day, eating Durian, and in this triple digit heat. I looked up to the sky and saw the mosque with its light kept on changing color accentuating twilight. I said out loud in Arabic, "Bismillah" asking God for mercy.

When I got there, I just really gave it up to destiny. Nigel looked so handsome I couldn't believe my eyes he was there. He had on a green Burberry polo shirt with khaki shorts. He actually looked like a hot tourist. Eric had a buttoned down casual shirt with shorts as well. He folded the sleeves up to his elbow. Both men looked incredibly handsome even in their casual get-ups. I had on a wrinkled white dress. My shoulders started to bruise from carrying my camera bag all day. I didn't even have a chance to freshen up.

Yet, Nigel looked super happy to see me. He opened his arms and I really didn't have much choice but to walk right into it. He landed a kiss on my forehead.

"What did you mouth off over there, Sabby?" that was the first thing Nigel said to me. He didn't even say hi.
"Hi Nigel. Surprise to see you here." I said, annoyed. Yet, I breathed in his scent and it felt like home.
"Hi.." He said and smiled.
"I think she said Bismillah.." Eric said and laughed. "It means in God's name in Arabic." Eric said as he read it off his phone.
"I just needed God's help." I said. "First word that came to mind when I saw the mosque and you." I said, referring to Nigel. "I meant no disrespect." I said.
Both Nigel and Eric  tried to pull a chair for me; however, Nigel won and Eric let Nigel helped me to sit down. What gentlemen these two.
Nigel flagged down the waitress and Eric handed me the pipe.
"No thanks." I said.
"Oh...come on...one drag." Eric said.
"I don't smoke."
"It's water pipe.." Nigel said.
I rolled my eyes and took a drag. It actually was nice.
"Not bad, right?" Eric said and smiled.
"It's alright." I said. I turned to Nigel... "What are you doing here, Mr. Gallagher?" my eyes were so accusatory towards him.
"The acquisition." Eric said. "What else."
"I'm only here for three days. I'll return to Chicago when you two are heading to Cambodia."
"That's a short trip." I said. "That'll kill you."
"I know. It'll be brutal." Nigel said. "But this needs to be done."
"I don't know what you two are up to with his acquisition." I said. "I don't want to know."
"It's a good thing, Sabrina." Eric said. "We're expanding. Business is good." I nodded. "Yeah, for sure." I said.
Nigel kept on looking at me, and I could see sadness in his eyes. At times however, his eyes flickered also with a tinge of excitement. I sure love that man no matter how hard I tried not to, no matter how hard I tried to hate him. I couldn't even fake the feeling I felt to see him here half way around the world. He's like an oasis in the midst of angst I had been feeling day in and day out with Eric. I wish I could get rid of Eric so I could talk to Nigel in private. Yet, I knew it wouldn't happen.

We ended up eating dinner in a nearby restaurant and continued on drinking. I didn't know what to do with these two and I just really had to drink until I really passed my limit. I knew I got super drunk. I didn't even know what I was saying or doing. It was a total blur. Last thing I remember was pounding on the table after I slammed the shot glass on it and screaming 'it isn't fair.'

The only retribution was Nigel and Eric were pretty wasted too. It would be super funny if we ended up in a threesome together. No, that wouldn't be funny at all. Sure enough, when I woke up, I wasn't in my room. We were in a nice suite overlooking the beautiful Singapore skyline. I saw Eric totally passed out face down on one of the sofas. I crawled a little bit from the chaise where I had laid down, and I looked around for Nigel. This must have been his suite. He had to be on the bed. As I walked incoherently trying to find Nigel or my way out, I found him sitting on the desk, working on his laptop.

I walked towards him, and I brushed his shoulder with my body by accident.

"Hey.." I said. He turned to see me, and he put his arm around my waist trying to steady me.
"Heeey..." he said. "What are you doing up?" He asked.
"I should ask you the same thing." I said.
"Jet lag." He said. "I was out for a bit too, believe me." He said. "But now, I'm up. Not even sleepy or tired."
"Was I that drunk?"
"Oh..yeah." Nigel said and laughed.
"Great." I said. "Getting lit with my two bosses."
Nigel chuckled a little. "What happened on the road.."
"Stay on the road." I said and laughed as I nodded agreeing to it. "Surprised that you didn't take advantage of me."
"What made you think I didn't?" Nigel asked naughtily.
I believed him for a split second and I checked my clothing... I looked disheveled but he didn't do anything to me.
"I can't believe you actually thought I did." Nigel said.
"I'm just checking."
"Yes, Eric and I took turn on you. Except, I boxed his nose when he tried to take his turn. That's why he's out." I hit him hard on his shoulder blade.
"That's nasty." I said to him.
"Well..?" He asked in disbelief. I felt sick and I started rubbing my tummy. I held his hand...and he caressed my hand softly as he put me on his lap.
"Take me back to my room." I said. "I don't think I could make it on my own."
"Just stay here."
"No.." I said. "If I had my better judgment, I wouldn't be here even now."
"Here we go again, Sabrina the prudence."
"Call me what you want." I said. "You must mistaken me for Charlotte Reed."
Nigel shook his head and laughed. "Let's go. I'll take you to your room before Eric hears anything and all these rubbish about Charlotte Reed."
"He's out." I said.
"I thought you were too." Nigel said. "Look at you now - up and giving me a hard time."
"I think I'm going to be sick." I said. I ran to the bathroom, and I just made it in a nick of  time to the toilet. Then, everything came out. Great! I just barfed in Nigel's toilet.

Nigel ran after me, and he stood by the door.
"Are you okay, honey?" He asked.
I couldn't even answer him as the second wave of barf came flowing out of me.
"Uhhhh.." Nigel grunted. Instead of leaving, he knelt next to me, and held my hair.
"Oh my God.." I said... "Oh my God." I said as I slouched down to the floor, mortified.
"Are you okay?" Nigel asked again.
"Kill me... kill me now." I said mortified. Nigel handed my hair to me, and he got up to get me a wet towel. I flushed it all out and I just couldn't believe Nigel saw everything. Nigel handed me the towel.."thank you." I said and wiped my mouth.
"Feeling a little better?" He asked. I nodded.
"Yeah...just mortified." I said. "I couldn't believe I just barfed in front of you and you were holding my hair."
He looked at me with love as he caressed my hair and tucked it behind my ear, and he said..."I've seen worse." he said. "Many many times." He must have been referring to Marcy being sick.
"Still.." I said. "It wasn't exactly how I wanted you to see me."
"I love you, Sabby. A little projectile of vomit wouldn't change my feelings for you." He said as he kissed my forehead. You didn't know the emotions I felt inside of me. It must have felt like the barf swirling down in a cyclone down the pipe.
"It could be worse. I could have vomited on you."
"That would be worse." Nigel said. "In that case, I would have to drag you in the shower with me." I smiled a little imagining how nice would that be. Instead, I just looked down and the next thing I said was..
"Uh, Nigel... please give me a moment to gather myself." I said as I looked up to him.
He nodded and closed the bathroom door.

He took me back to my room, and I turned around to him when I got to my door and opened the door. I was going to say good night. However, Nigel pushed open the door and walked in.

"I didn't say you could come in."
"I paid for your room." He said.
"No, the company will." I said.
"The company that I own." He said. I rolled my eyes.
"You can't be serious." I said.
"Hey, I'll use any excuse I can to make you stop pushing me away."
I threw my hands in the air. "Dude, you're married and have a girlfriend. Leave me alone." I said.
"Dude?" Nigel asked. "I'm a dude, now?"
I sighed..."I'm still drunk and my head is pounding. I don't know what you want from me."
"I tried to call you so many Goddamn times and you didn't even care to answer nor return the calls."
"Well, I would think you would get the hint. Don't tell me you're my boss and I had to return your calls."
"As a matter of fact, I am your boss. What if it's work emergency?"
"Fire me." I said.
"Don't tempt me." He said. I turned around to him huffing.
"Don't piss me off even more, Nigel." I said.
"You wouldn't be pissed off if you would have given me a chance to explain. Did you hear my messages??"
"I deleted them. I had enough hearing men's bullshits."
"Oh dear Jesus, Sabrina." Nigel said. "You're one difficult woman." He said as he came towards me and lunged at me. He grabbed my body in one sweep ever so sexy, and next thing I knew he was kissing me. I pushed his body away, but the next breathe, I couldn't fight it. I didn't want to fight it.
We fell on the couch, and we kissed and kissed. My tears rolled down my cheeks the whole time.

It was always bitter sweet when it came to Nigel. I had been feeling so hurt the past week, and at the same time trying to hate and stop loving this one man I truly love. But he's here, and he was kissing me and loving me and whispering how he missed me.

When our eyes met, and we stopped kissing, I saw those beautiful green eyes were so full of love. They were so beautiful I had to look away.

"I love you." He said. "I missed you, darling like you wouldn't believe."
"Is that why you came?" He nodded.
"Yes. Because you wouldn't return my calls."
"I need to change." I said. "I feel crummy."
I pushed him to side, and got up from the sofa. I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I couldn't believe Nigel kissed me after I vomited. If that wasn't love I didn't know what else.
I took off my dress and washed up. My shoulders were sore and I could feel the tension I carried there. I stood there in front of the mirror in my underwear looking at the girl who again just kissed a married man. I hated myself for being so weak. I hated myself for being such a fool to fall in love with a man like Nigel. I really wished things were different but reality was hard and cold.

Nigel came in to the bathroom. I was startled at first and tried to cover up.

"What are you doing? The bathroom is occupied."
"I was wondering if you were okay." Nigel said. "You're taking a very long time." He said but his eyes were fixated on my semi naked body. 
He came towards me and stood behind me. He caressed my bruised shoulders as he played with my bra strap, and he kissed it. His lips felt so warm against my skin. He put his arms around my bare belly, as he caressed it softly.
"You're so beautiful, sweetheart." he said.
"I'm sure not as beautiful as Charlotte Reed." I said. "Please get off of me." I said as I pushed his hands down and off my belly. I turned around, and I saw he had an erection. I couldn't help but laugh.
He said.."that's a great way to kill the mood."
"Well, yeah..." I said. "It's probably a good thing that the mood is killed." I said.
"Charlotte Reed, or should I say, Doctor....Charlotte Reed, is my therapist." He said.
I frowned when I heard that.
"If you would have listened to my messages, you would have known." Nigel said. "I've been going to see her during lunch break for the past three months." Nigel said.
"Don't bullshit me." I said.
"I'm not bullshitting you." Nigel said. "She's a licensed psychologist. She's been helping me cope with the stress of work, a sick wife who doesn't love me, and falling in love with a woman who works for me who wants me and rejects me at the same time. Yes, I've been in therapy."
"Do you always buy your therapist a Tiffany diamond necklace, Nigel?? Do you??" I snapped.
Nigel looked at me funny... "What?" he asked.
"You heard me!" I said.
"Where did you hear these things??" He asked and laughed. "In fact, how did you find out about Charlotte?"
"Your secretary has a big mouth. But who would blame her? That's part of being a secretary."
"Beverly?"
"She has one humongous mouth too, but your New York assistant."
Nigel shook his head back and forth in disbelief. He then said.. "I guess I need to talk to her."
"To keep her mouth shut next time?"
"Yes and no." Nigel said. "I'll be right back. Stay put." He said.

When he left I quickly bolted the door and put "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door. If he came back, I couldn't and wouldn't know how to stop things from happening. I haven't really done a good job so far. I needed to digest the fact that Charlotte Reed wasn't Nigel's other girlfriend, but his therapist. However, why would he be buying her a necklace?? To say thanks? I guess I didn't understand the gift etiquette for the ultra rich people. To me, a Tiffany diamond necklace is a gift for a special woman in a man's life.  About ten minutes later, I heard a knock on my door.

"Sabrina...please open."
He kept on banging on the door.
"Nigel...go back to your room." I said. "It's late and I'm sick." I said. "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Sabby... please. Stop pushing me away."
I put my cheek on the door as I wiped away tears.
"Good night, Nigel. Try to get some sleep." I said.
"Sabrina.."
I just stayed quiet. Then I heard he said..
"I'm leaving something out here for you. Please go get it after I leave."
"Another trick, Nigel?" I asked.
"No trick, sweetheart." He said. "Good night."

I looked through the peep hole he was walking away. I was contemplating to open the door or not, because he could just barge in again. Boy, what a night. As usual, even if it was 3 A.M in the morning, I had my usual tug of war in my heart. I wished I could have him on my bed, and not have anything to worry about. That feeling when he was on top of me on the couch, kissing me, felt like a dream come true. It felt so nice.

Chapter 27

We spent two days scourging Singapore for foods and pictures. We went to the obvious tourist spots as well as some obscure places where the local eat. Eric for the most part was still mesmerized with the whole food scene and how I was so accustomed to find interesting food to feature on the magazine. One of his favorite things surprisingly was when we went to a street vendor who sells Singaporean fried rice noodle, and then we could add other items to add as side dishes for the noodle such as fried eggs, fried fish cakes in all shapes and forms, stir-fry vegetables, etc. Eric really enjoyed that meal even though it was not his usual breakfast.

Don't get me wrong - I still couldn't stand the guy. I was hoping he would get the traveler's sickness pretty soon. That was mean of me. I was really just kidding. I didn't wish ill on anyone even though I may hate his guts.

We were sitting outside by the street vendor at Hougang Mall in the northeastern side of Singapore enjoying our meals. The sun was shining so bright and it was hot and humid even though it was only 9:00 AM local time.

"I didn't think I would like starchy breakfast like this." Eric said as he shoved a big portion of noodles with his chopsticks into his mouth.
"I'm used to it." I said. "My mom is Indonesian. They eat rice with every meal - breakfast, lunch, dinner." I said. Eric nodded.
"This is so good!" Eric said. "Simple, but good. I love this hot chili sauce...wow." Eric said as he shook his head so fast. "It's so spicy..my mouth and nostrils are burning."
"Take it easy there, cowboy." I said and laughed a little.
"Mh...I love spicy food. This is really hot though..but it's so delicious."
"I love street vendor food like this." I said. "It's what the locals eat. It's pure." I said.
"You do know your food, Sabrina. I give you that."
"Ugh... thus why I'm a food editor, Eric." I said annoyed. "If I didn't know food, I shouldn't be a chef and a food editor."
"I'm not trying to insult you. I was just trying to show you my admiration of you being a subject matter expert. It may be obvious to you, but I don't work closely with you to know how familiar you are with every nooks and crannies of food."
"Well, consider yourself enlightened now." I said. Eric looked at me confused and then he said..
"How do I manage to annoy you with every word I say?"
"I don't know. I guess you're so precise you just hit the bull's eye every time."
"Come on, now. You're being really unfair to me." Eric said. "It's baseless."
"I didn't say anything unfair." I said.
"Just see the upside of what I said. The glass is not always half empty."
"I'll try my best to remember that next time." I said.
"Thank you. That is all I ask. We do have one more week to spend together."
"Don't remind me." I said.
"Oh, and that's not insulting?" Eric asked.
"What??" I didn't realize I said it out loud. "I'm sorry. I'm just....ugh....I'm just eating." I said.
"You're not the only one who can get pissed off." Eric said.
"You're right." I said. "I just have a lot in my mind." I said.
"What's up?" Eric asked. "Care to share?"
"No..." I said.
"Okaaaaay...."
"I don't even know where to start. It's complicated." I said. "But, nothing serious and it has nothing to do with work, so I should just keep it to myself."
"Well, if you need to vent, I'm all ears."
"Yeah, I don't think it would be appropriate. Especially not since you are auditing me. I should just play it safe."
"Uh...Actually...about me coming with you, it has nothing to do with the audit."
"Oh?"
"It's Derek's idea. We're doing a due diligence to acquire a local magazine here as Joie Asia Pacific extension. Derek thinks it'll be easier if I would tag along with you to learn the rope of the local market inconspicuously."
"Wow..good to know." Eric laughed.
"Sorry. Derek did say inconspicuously."
"And you made me believe I'm still being audited this whole trip?"
"Hey, it has only been four days. Besides, you're not exactly nice to me." Eric said. "So, why should I be nice to you?" He said as he chewed on a fish cake.
"That's so not nice." I said as tipped his chopsticks he was using to pin another fish cake so it fell to his plate. He laughed as he jumped back a little avoiding splashes.
"I couldn't believe you!" I said.
"Come on, Sabrina...it doesn't affect anything at all." He said. "You still can't say no. It's still coming all the way up from Derek himself."
"I can still be pissed about it. This is done under false pretenses."
"My God.... don't you have a sense of humor? I don't understand why Nigel talks so highly about you all the time." Eric said. "You're being a bitch."
"Excuse me? Did you just call me a bitch?"
"No. I just said you're acting like one. Quit it. It's not a big deal."
"Well, I'm calling you an asshole. There....Asshole." I said and I stood up and left him there.

I just walked around the shops in that mall complex letting out steams. I didn't know how that guy could just make me so mad all the time. Good thing I found things rather quickly that kept me occupied. There was a wet traditional market behind the mall, and I just had a ball taking pictures. I talked to some of the sellers and wrote a lot of notes. This trip could have been a fiasco but I knew I would still produce a great solid piece out of it. I just really couldn't believe everything. My life has not been boring for the last month. There have been way too many surprises and unexpected events. I could say nothing should surprise me anymore. If I were to see a pig with wings flying above me, I wouldn't go whoaa. That wouldn't be surprising at all. One thing Eric said that I did catch was something about Nigel talking so highly of me. That actually made me smile but sad at the same time. I guess Nigel talked about me. I wonder what he would say about Charlotte Reed.

My God, I really have been trying the past two days to forget everything that happened back home. I still couldn't erase it completely from my mind and heart. It still weighs rather heavily in my chest. I wish I could find some Chinese remedies to alleviate it. There have to be some wild goat knuckles or panda claw concoction that can do just that - heal a broken heart. No?

Then, I passed a shop selling the Singaporean Bak Wah, Bee Cheng Hiang the store called. Bak Wah is similar to jerky; however it is made by ground pork or chicken, thinned down to a jerky like consistency and grilled. It tastes rather sweet as well compared to savory. I bought a pile of the Bak Wah, and I really did forget about the heavy heart. They were so delicious. I sat on a park bench, eating the Bak Wah, and I was totally just daydreaming.

All of a sudden, Eric came approaching me.

"I've looked all over for you." He said. "In this heat." He said as he panted a little and sat next to me.
"I didn't ask you to look for me."
"Well, you have the car key." He said.
I rolled my eyes.
"You can't still be mad, Sabrina."
"Oh yes, I can. Yes, I can." I said.
"But you're not." Eric said. His blue eyes were calm and his strong facial feature actually softened a bit. I looked at him, and I really wanted to hate him, but I knew it was childish. So I shook my head back and forth. "I'm not."
Eric cracked a smile. "I'm sorry. It wasn't meant as a lie. I didn't mean to make you mad, again."
"It's okay. Water under the bridge." I said.
"What's that you're eating?" He asked.
"Singaporean jerky." I said. "Bak Wah." I said as I offered him some. He took one and he started chewing and nodding. "Yumm.." He said. I smiled a little.
"I need to go back to the gym later." He said.
"You do that." I said.
"Mh...this is so good!" he said about the Bak Wah. "Oh, by the way, Victoria called me asking for you." Eric continued. "She said you're not answering her calls."
"That's right." I said. "It's okay...I'm sure she rather talks to you anyway."
"She has been acting differently lately. Very friendly. She kept calling, and asking me to hang out and go out." Eric muttered. He had a puzzled expression on his face.
"Why not? Did you? Can't be bad going out with Victoria." Eric shook his head.
"No... I didn't understand why all of a sudden she acts all friendly with me. More than the usual." Eric said. "I've been so busy with all types of acquisition and tax day is coming up, I just don't have the time."
"But she's Victoria Perkins." I said.
"So what?" Eric asked with a frown.
"She's every man's fantasy." Eric laughed.
"Is she?"
"Some of us thought so." I said. "She's everything a woman wants to be."
Eric laughed. "I don't have ill things to say about your best friend, Sabrina. However, there are more to a man's fantasy than a pretty face and a great body."
I slouched my shoulders. "You had to say it, didn't you?" I said. "What else do you guys want?"
"When I think of my dream woman, I didn't picture Victoria." Eric said.
"Oh...she'll hate you for you saying that." I said.
"It's the truth..." He said. "I picture a sweet natural beauty rather than a beautiful face that's always perfectly done up. I picture a woman with a nice curve that shows she enjoys life, rather than a skinny model-like body knowing that she probably eats cotton."
I started to laugh a little. I guess Eric is not as shallow as I thought.
"I picture a woman who talks about others around her and her passions, rather than talking about herself." Eric continued. I continued to pay attention to what he said. "And lastly, I picture woman who is not afraid. She's just not afraid of anything."
"Hope you will find her, Eric." I said with a smile. "She sounds wonderful."
"She is wonderful, Sabrina. That's the truth and I know where she is." he said.
"Ah...lucky you, then." I said and started chewing another Bak Wah. Of course, he found his dream woman. Why wouldn't he.
"She hates my guts though." Eric said and laughed.
"I guess it's a trend with you. You think I hate you too. Maybe you need to change your way, then maybe you will have a chance with her."
"That's a great advice, Sabby." Eric said and laughed. "I may take you up on that."

Funny that the guy whom I thought as one of the shallowest guys in the world turned out to be decent. Maybe, Eric was just confused because of the heat he wasn't thinking clearly. However, I guess he really wasn't all that into Victoria. He never seemed to gravitate towards her. What are the odds that Victoria is actually falling for Eric. She hasn't been in love with anyone for years and years. Now, when she opened her heart to someone, that person already had somebody else in mind. From the description, Victoria didn't even come close to Eric's dream woman. Eric's dream woman actually sounded more like a realistic person than a dream. I still think Victoria is more dreamy though I do hate her guts right at this moment.

I really didn't know what it would take to repair our friendship. I knew that I would forgive and forget but I just couldn't believe we shared a penis. Ugh, that just made me gagged big time. The only positive thing was I was first and she took my leftover. I still didn't get why she did what she did. I kept on wondering and how people could just succumb to desire and forget about norms, friendships, and morals. I wanted Nigel more than anything. There was nothing I wanted more than to have him inside me as we made hot passionate love all night long. I didn't even know Marcy. She's not my friend. Yet, I still couldn't do it. I couldn't just listen to what my body said about jumping his bone while he was laying on my bed more than willing. I listened to my heart and to my brain. At the end, people do wrong things because they chose to do so. It wasn't because of the devil, desire, temptations, and all those. It was simply because they made the decision to go and take that path. I chose not to.

Victoria knew how devastated I was when Jax broke up with me. I gave Jax my everything and I thought I finally found my soul mate. The days we spent getting to know each other and all the words he told me sounded so right. I didn't think I could find a better guy for me. He might have not been the richest and the most educated; yet, he understood me. He laughed at me and with me. He liked food I made. He always made me feel pretty. I really thought I found the one in Jax Weston. We had an unbelievable sex life too on top of everything else. After we broke up, I cried half the time of losing him and how he broke my heart. The other half, I cried missing the sex I used to have with him and his crooked wiener.

Imagining Victoria enjoying those times made me want to kill someone. It just really wreaked havoc deep inside of me no matter how hard I tried not to think about it. It must be great to be Vic - she had tons of fun sleeping with my hot sexy police officer ex boyfriend, and now she thinks she can just move on and be Mrs. CFO of Joie. I wish I had that confidence and the gall. Victoria looked like a woman, but I think she had two big balls under that tight pencil skirt she wears.

She had the gall to fuck my ex boyfriend. She is going South with me. I always thought of her as North side and how I want to go up North. Not anymore.